Fear? No, That’s confidence!!

Most people think that when you take a Yoga Teacher Training Course that you have desires to become a yoga teacher.  I did not feel that way.  I knew that I loved yoga, and every class made me feel awesome, so much so, that I wanted to continue feeling awesome for the rest of my life, so that is why I signed up.  I thought I would receive training on how to live, and that these poses could make me a healthy person.   I also felt like my angels (and inner gut) were practically shouting in my ear to do this, that it will be good for you, and to trust the process of learning.  I did get all that I expected, and so MUCH more!  

But I also had some major questions coming into training.  I was/am Catholic, would I be taught a different religion?  Was yoga a religion?  (answer:  No yoga is not a religion, but a way to live at peace with yourself and others, that aligns with your religion values, no matter what religion you happen to be). My biggest fear was still lurking…..I didn’t feel worthy enough to teach this awesome practice.  I couldn’t do ½ of the poses, I was very stiff and inflexible.  And, Oh the horror of standing up and teaching others how to do this??!!!  Very intimidating!!  But I put in the work of learning.  I was horrible at pronouncing Sanskrit, so my teacher made a cassette recording (back in 2006!) on how to say everything.  I went home, studied, worked, and put in the time to learn.  

You know, when you are ready, the teacher appears.  Thus, is how I happened to fall into teaching yoga.  Mid way through teacher training, I got asked to teach a class, and accepted, and things naturally fell into place.  Although I was nervous before, probably during and after teaching, it felt right to do this.  Probably more right than most decisions I had made with my life.  It took many years of teaching not to be so nervous, and to stand up and really know I can teach.  

I tell this story to my trainees to let them know, it’s ok to have many fears, it’s not ok not to do anything about them.  Sure, you might feel difficult overcoming any hurdle, but it’s better than doing nothing about getting over that hurdle.  

And the best part?  All these years later, when I stand up, teach, I still get a thrill!  I feel humbled and honored that people want to come to my class, but I get it’s not about me!  It’s about the student’s experience of yoga on their mat, and I’m just a “guide”.   If I have done my job of learning how yoga works, I can be a better teacher, and I’m still learning!  I work hard to “lighten” the load everyone carries, and to bring a little calm in their day, and to see them smile on the way out???  Bonus!! My friends!  Pure bliss!

See you on the mat,

Paula

“everything you want is on the other side of fear”